Are you a "Silent Caretaker" or a "Solitary Observer"? Take this compassionate 20-question test to discover how you share and receive emotional signals.
Emotional Availability Test: What is your connection style?
Relationships
We have all experienced those confusing moments in relationships where we feel "missed." You might feel like you are shouting your needs into a void, or perhaps you feel overwhelmed by a partner’s emotions and just want to shut down. It’s easy to label these moments as "communication problems," but often, they run deeper. They are about Emotional Availability.
This test is not about judging whether you are a "good" or "bad" partner. It is a tool designed to help you visualize the invisible currents of your relationships: how much you let others in, and how well you tune in to them. By understanding your unique style, you can stop repeating the same friction points and start building bridges that actually reach the other side.
Understanding your emotional availability is one of the most effective ways to improve the quality of your closest bonds. This assessment can help you:
Emotional Availability is the capacity to share an emotional connection with another person. It sounds simple, but it is actually a complex dance involving two distinct skills: sending signals and receiving them.
Many of us believe we are "available" simply because we want a relationship. But true availability requires a balance of vulnerability (letting yourself be seen) and sensitivity (seeing the other person).
This test explores questions like:
This assessment draws inspiration from established psychological frameworks, including Attachment Theory (Bowlby/Ainsworth) and the Biringen Emotional Availability Scales (EAS). It adapts clinical concepts of dyadic adjustment and emotional regulation into a format suitable for self-reflection.
We measure your availability across two primary dimensions:
The test consists of 20 questions and typically takes about 3–5 minutes to complete.
You will see a series of statements about how you handle feelings, conflict, and intimacy. You will rate each one on a scale from 1 (Strongly Disagree) to 7 (Strongly Agree).
Note: Answer in a way that reflects your everyday patterns, not how you wish you would behave on your best day. Be honest—the most accurate result comes from the most vulnerable answers.
We calculate your score on both the "Output" and "Input" dimensions. By combining these two scores, we map you into one of four distinct "Connection Styles."
This test is especially helpful if you:
Please consider seeking professional help instead if:
We don’t just give you a number; we provide a narrative that acts as a mirror to your relationship style. Based on your balance of Disclosure and Sensitivity, you will likely fall into one of these 4 profiles:
Your full report will also include specific strengths, common pitfalls, and a personalized action plan.
No style is "broken," and no style is permanent. Your result is simply a snapshot of your current habits.
"Use your result as a starting point for compassion, not judgment. Recognizing a wall is the first step to installing a door."
We will provide you with:
Many users find it helpful to show their results to a partner or close friend as a conversation starter (e.g., "This result says I tend to withdraw when I'm stressed—does that feel true to you?").
You are an open door and a safe harbor, capable of both deep sharing and deep listening.
You are a master listener who holds space for everyone else, often hiding yourself in the process.
You value independence and self-containment, viewing emotions as private waters best navigated alone.
You wear your heart on your sleeve, but sometimes struggle to tune in to the hearts of others.