Test Result
Mania (The Obsessive Lover)
“You view love as a high-stakes emotional lifeline—craving intense closeness and constant reassurance.”
Your overall pattern: The Obsessive Lover (Mania)
For you, love is the most important thing in the world—and also the most terrifying. You love with a desperate intensity, wanting to merge completely with your partner. When things are good, you feel high on life. But when your partner is distant or quiet, you may feel physically ill with anxiety.
You are incredibly attuned to your partner's moods. You notice every shift in tone, every delayed text message. This sensitivity means you care deeply, but it also means you are often riding an emotional rollercoaster. You likely view love as a rescue mission—you want to be saved, or to save someone else.
"The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread." — Mother Teresa
Typical behaviors
- Hyper-Vigilance: Constantly checking your phone or analyzing your partner's words for signs of withdrawal.
- Testing: You might create small dramas or "tests" to see if your partner really cares enough to fight for you.
- Jealousy: You feel threatened easily by potential rivals or even your partner's friends/hobbies.
Strengths in this pattern
- Intensity: Your partner never has to guess if you are into them; your devotion is absolute.
- Passion: You bring a dramatic energy that can be exciting and flattering to some partners.
Common pitfalls
Holding on too tight can squeeze the life out of love.
- Self-Fulfilling Prophecy: Your fear of abandonment can lead to clingy behaviors that actually drive partners away.
- Exhaustion: The constant cycle of highs and lows is exhausting for both you and your partner.
"Reflection point: Does this relationship make me feel safe, or does it make me feel like I'm constantly treading water?"
What you can do next
Small actions you can start today
- Practice the "20-minute pause." When you feel the urge to send a panicked text, wait 20 minutes. Distract yourself. Then see if you still need to send it.
- Invest time in a hobby that has nothing to do with your partner, to build your own sense of self.
Longer-term directions
- Work on Self-Soothing. Your safety must come from inside you, not from your partner's reassurance.
- Seek partners who are consistent and secure (like the Storge type), rather than "bad boys/girls" (Ludus) who trigger your anxiety.
Disclaimer and when to seek help
This test describes behavioral patterns for educational purposes only. If your anxiety in relationships affects your daily functioning or leads to controlling behavior, professional therapy can be incredibly helpful and healing.